Monday, September 6, 2010
I is very sad, because it has been a few days since i talked to and seen hubby )': Can't find the motivation for studying, just hanging there. hais. The worst thing is he left his laptop on and that means he's online but he's not there, false alarm, made me excited for a second... Don't even know when will he be there or when he's away.. Just have to WAIT for his reply. FASTER REPLYYYYY BOYFEEEEEE, I WANNA SEE YOUUUU NOWWWW ): i don't even have the appetite to eat. i really miss you.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Hubby left for labuan at 11pm ): Sorry dear, i didn't meant to raise my voice but i was really sad and mad that you actually think that my work is more important that YOU. You are the most important person in my life, you're all i ever wanted. But i'm still glad i found out in time to at least see you before you went off, if not you'll never imagine how regretful will i be and how hard will i be crying now. I miss you already and i'm so happy you miss me too.. hehehehe
Just now was webcam-ing with hubby :D imma happy girl! I miss your smell and your laughter. hehehehe.. We just finished chatting on FB because hubby was hungry so he needa find some food to eat.. hahahahah.. i just hope to see him again <3
Sunday, August 22, 2010
I've been crying almost everynight these days, i really can't hold back my tears when i'm alone. But i think i really need to let out everything my dear, i need your hug and tell me everything is gonna be alright when you're away. Hug me real tight and a peck on my forehead will do everything. I think i'll be back to normal if you really did, did that. Because all my mind was, you're gonna be away and i don't know when, i want you by my side but i don't know how. When i don't know how, i think i'm really forcing you and you know that i hate forcing you, so i gave in. All of the bad stuffs i did to you in the past, i'm very sorry from the bottom of my heart and i'll use this 6months to prove that i've really learn and you're the one i want to spend my life with. my eyes are all puffy now and i'm missing you again.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
I think i'm going through a mental breakdown. I hate the pressures i'm having now, i hate the fact that dear's going away for attachment real soon, i hate to see him leave, i want him to stay right here with me but i know that's not gonna happen because i know he's future & career is really important to him and i'm not gonna be his obstacle in life, i wanna be the one who motivates him into doing the things he should to have a better future :) but i'm really really sad, i can be crying just by thinking of him leaving and be away. Dear, i'm sorry if these days you think i'm showing attitude towards you but i'm really not, i just wanna be with you and spent as much time as i could with you and tell you all the things like all these to you but somehow at times i don't even know where to begin with. I really do love you and i'm really sorry for what i have done in the past to hurt you and yes, i blame and hate myself for making you turning into working this industry but whatever it is, believe or not, i'm gonna wait for you and i'll prove you that you could eventually trust me again. Having to lose you is like cutting my own flesh, its a unbearable pain so i'm sorry, i'm never gonna cut my own flesh, i'm not and will not lose you again.
Another thing, STUPID ETP PROJECT. darn it. Its not that i don't projects its just that everything cramped up. urgh, if only my lecturer forgets about it. fml
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